Hello~ Áعü..

First of all, thanks for your essay. you uploaded it early in the morning.

But I guess~ that's why there are many(?) wrong spellings. Please check it out before typing^^

Second, make some paragraphs~ my eyes are getting painful!!!!

But I like your story order.

Next, your conclusion is so so fantastic(?) ~

You wrote ' Yesterday's lunch time was fantastic '.

Well...I want you to find the form of essay or how to write essay.